Lance's other friends don't like Justin, don't get why Lance hangs out with him. They call him white trash and punk and other names Justin would sneer at because he knows they're true. Lance doesn't always defend him—Justin pisses him the hell off too, sometimes. But he knows far more about Justin's motivations than they ever could. He's Justin's best friend, probably.

Justin's not a patient person, and he's really not patient when Lance talks about going to college. Lance spends a large percentage of their conversations being called a "fucking tool." It hurts, kind of. But he figures it hurts Justin more to know he won't be getting out. Justin's a smart kid and it isn't fair.

He knows Justin drags him up to Thayer because he wants to see Chris. But he wonders how much of Chris, JC, and Joey's lifestyles Justin's absorbing just by hanging out with them. He knows that Justin thinks about what's going to happen after high school, and he wonders what kind of ideas Justin gets from hearing them talk about their lives.

Those phone conversations with JC eventually come to mean more than Justin expected them to. They're another escape those times he can't get up to Thayer, or to Lance's, or out skating. He's a little worried that he sometimes says too much. JC's a good guy, he doesn't need Justin's problems laid on his doorstep. The conversations help fill the silence, though, which is what he's left with when the yelling stops. Sometimes it's worse when it's quiet; it can be hard to breathe in the silence.

JC asks him about what he'll do after high school. He says he doesn't know. He doesn't tell him about the dream of running away. He told Lance, once, and Lance said it would be better to run to something. Fucking Lance knew nothing about it. So he doesn't mention leaving, but talks about getting a better job, full time, more money. JC offers to introduce him to a friend, and Justin thinks that's sweet and tells him so. He doesn't take JC up on it, though. He doesn't want to make JC look bad to his friend.


next
table of contents