Justin hasn't been to school in close to two weeks. Lance worries about this. He worries about Justin-continually. His friends sometimes ask, "What happened to that skater guy you hang out with?" More than one jokes that he quit school. Lance gets angry because he's scared. What if Justin has quit? Quitting school is like committing suicide, he thinks. Your life is over.

At lunch one day, in front of his friends who he is starting to think aren't his friends, Nick comes up, casual-cool, and asks if he's heard from Justin. Sue gasps and whispers comments behind her hand to Jeff and Kara gives him half-dirty, half-flirty looks. Lance catches them and wonders how many checked out Justin the same way. He feels tired and too-thin stretched and he gets up and nods to Nick to walk with him. He hates them suddenly, and misses Justin and bars and nights being a grown up. He longs for high school to be over.

Nick is quiet as they walk, letting Lance be. When they are far enough away Lance says, "Kara likes you, you know."

Nick doesn't even glance in her direction. "She's a bitch."

"Justin's staying with a friend."

Nick's eyes are disconcerting. "He's ok?" He can read Lance's answer. "Tell him to give me a call sometime."

Lance nods. He wishes...

Nick isn't his friend. And his friends aren't his friends. Justin might be a dropout. He turns and heads upstairs to the music room. It will be quiet in there and he can plan what to say to Justin. Maybe he'll even drive up tonight.

JC answers Lance's call and listens to what he has to say. He puts Justin on the phone. And watches expressions run over his face as he listens and thanks Lance and gives a forceful, "I don't know!" and "Maybe I don't fucking care!" JC decides it is time to do something. Joey, he thinks, will let him borrow his car.

He wakes Justin up from where he'd fallen asleep on the couch, shakes his bony shoulder, and demands he wake up. Justin curses but rolls upright and stares and demands "What the fuck, JC?" JC thinks 'He's better' and says, "Time for school."

Justin is incredulous and then belligerent, and Joey wakes up and sleepy-annoyed throws Justin into the shower fully clothed. "You're going to stink up my car."

He is sputtering and cursing when he comes out, and it makes JC laugh, giggle really, as he hands Justin a t-shirt and khakis. Justin complains about those-too loose, too tight.

"Shut up." It lacks force, JC knows, but he is still giggling. "Are those curls, man?" And Justin is mortified and pissed off and JC tells him to get in the car and hands him a Brown bookstore bag of tupperware containers. "Joey made you lunch."

The bitching and moaning continues a bit longer, and JC wonders if this is what Lance was complaining about and decides to give his sympathies when he sees him next.

"I'm not going to tell you where school is."

Justin has subsided into sullen slouching against the car door.

"I got Lance to give me directions."

Silence. Then, "I look like a fucking tool."

"We can shave your head again tonight, if you want."

"Fucking Lance, " he mutters, and turns on the radio, tuned it to BRU.

When they pull up to school, Justin sits until JC kicks him out of the car. "Joey'll pick you up at two. Call if you don't need a ride."

Justin stands, looking lost. JC notes the bruises on his face are fading, thinks about time and measure and pounding and stains left on the body. A horn makes him start and say, "Go to school, Justin." He drives away.

He knows it's going to suck, he'll be stared at and yelled at and teachers will be 'disappointed.' He almost ditches.

He finds Lance with that bitch Sue and his other tool friend and tells him he's a fucker. Lance grins and says, "Nice pants." Justin gives him the finger.

The day is endless and he hates it and he nearly gets in a fight with Tom Plummer over his pants and Nick has to separate them before he gets suspended. After, he remembers how normal this all was and it takes all he has not to break something, someone, not to fight or scream or tear things apart. He wants to fight. This is so unfair-

Joey picks him up, lets him play pounding loud music in the car, stops at the Army-Navy store when he asks, even buys him six-dollar army-green pants that are just the right size and a two-fifty black t-shirt. He wants his own clothes.

He thanks Joey and gets screwed on the 'you're welcome' when Joey stops by his parents' house on the Hill and his mom pinches Justin's cheeks and declares he is too thin and makes him eat homemade tortellini and bolognese sauce. Joey's sister hits on him and his Dad talks about the Red Sox's prospects for the season and when they leave his belly aches and his heart aches and he has a shitload of homework, two makeup tests and intimate knowledge of everything he doesn't have.


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